Life- Living it and loving it! ... most of the time

This will be a marathon of posts since I haven't kept up on life very well. Actually- I have been so busy keeping up with life that documenting it has definitely taken a back burner. :)


I wasn't thinking when I uploaded my pictures so they are actually backwards-- the bottom is the beginning of April and the top is towards the end.


At the annual Bezzant Family wienie roast. My dad actually ate that big piece of scorched marshmellow that one of the grandkids so lovingly cooked to perfection for him!


My mom and dad sporting their matching John Deere hoodies. Now-- will we see them wearing matching sweaters that my mom picks out???? :)



My brother, Joe's birthday! He loves these nanaimo bars that he had on his mission in Canada so I had to whip him up a batch for his big day. I reminded him that this shows how much I love him cause I don't spend 3+ hours on a dessert for just anyone! Seriously- Joe is a cool brother. He is ALWAYS quick with a joke and a teasing comment. We could say that he lives up to his calling as a brother to the maximum... even now that he is another year older! He has been a good sport to take the kids to a few Utah Flash basketball games-- which they LOVE!!



My other brother, Dave also had a b-day in April! Unfortunately for us, he lives in Arizona so he spent his birthday in warmth and sunshine so I don't have any pictures to post just yet. They will be up for Strawberry Days and I did promise him that I would make his favorite strawberry shortcake when he comes. Dave is generous, hardworking and seems to look on the bright side of things.

Easter Sunday 2011!

Last year Mason was just a few days old and I don't think I even took his picture so this year I had to make sure to get one of him alone. He loved hauling the easter basket all over the house and was even happier when he realized he had a few treats inside the eggs that he kept shaking! A new thing from the Easter Bunny this year was a solid large chocolate bunny! I don't think Landen's made it through the day-- he enjoyed each morsel so as it wouldn't go bad! :) Abbey got a double dutch jump rope, Braxton and Landen got Bey Bladers that they are VERY into and Mason got a beach towel. Everyone was very excited and happy for their stash.

More of the Annual Weinie Roast & Easter Egg Hunt! Abbey with her sweet cousin, Hannah.

My dad giving the kids a ride on the trailer around the orchard. Of course my mom is checking to make sure everyone is safe and happy. Mason lasted about 2' before he started crying. Everyone else had a blast and wanted more!

Landen with a cheek full of roasted marshmallow!

Landen searching for Easter Eggs! He was so excited about it I couldn't get him to stop talking for a second to snap a smile! :)

Can you see the egg in the middle to upper right hand part of the tree? Landen can and he is determined to shake that baby out of the tree! He got it down too!

Braxton w/ his best buddy & cousin, Porter! What a tag team!

Mason found one! He had a great time with that purple egg and didn't really care to find too many more! The rocks all over the ground that kept tripping him didn't help the situation either.

Yep- Mason is checking on his prized purple egg! He put that same egg in and out of his basket at least 30 times!

He has a concerned look on his face. Or maybe he is scowling at the rest of the kids to stay away from HIS egg!

The girls w/ Mason. Me, my sister, Kristie, my mom holding my niece, Mindy, my sister, Karen and my sister, Lisa, holding Mason.

Is it a baby bird? Nope- just Mason getting spoiled by Aunt Lisa with roasted marshmallows!

An impromtu BBQ with a neighbor and LOTS of kids! It was a last minute idea with scrounged up food from the house but we all had a great time! It was the perfect way to spend the evening. Now- I just need to plan ahead so that I have have ALL the neighbors over! :)

How did Bryce start off the month of April??? On the RIGHT foot! Literally!!! Bryce broke his left foot dirtbiking! He went out with a few friends down to Green River, UT one Saturday and ate it pretty good on his bike. He was going really fast through a whoop section and back end of his bike started getting out of control and bucked him about 15' in the air to which he came down and landed on his bike and broke his foot. Bryce wears all sorts of protective gear-- including big tough motorbike boots. He had to ride out several miles w/ his broken foot to get to the truck and then drive another 3 hours home! When he called me to tell me he was on his way he said," I think I hurt my foot." I didn't think anything of it-- a few scrapes and bruises are common and since he didn't give me any details at the time about his wreck-- I went about my night of feeding, bathing and taking care of the kids. He rolled in about 9:30 pm and I was busy in the office working on relief society stuff. I was trying to calm down after a really hard day with the kids. I was also probably having a bit of a pity party for myself. I felt overwork, underpaid and underappreciated at the moment. I was trying to figure out how I was going to strategically "let Bryce have it" to be a bit more aware of helping out around the house and spending more time with me. I was EXHAUSTED! (It didn't help that it had been rainy and cold ALL day, we were stuck inside with hyperactive boys that kept pushing each other's buttons while Mason quietly undid anything he saw was put away nicely!) Anyway- I hear the boys come home and then Bryce comes hopping in the house and down to the office. I said hi but kept working and didn't turn around. He started to tell me that his foot really hurt and that he couldn't walk on it. I turned around to give him a curtesy look and tell him to take some advil when I saw his foot! It was at least 3 times the size of his other foot and already getting black and blue! So much for my speech on "letting him have it!" How can you lecture somebody that is in this condition??? My sister, Lisa, ran up to the house to sit with our sleeping kids and off to the insta care we went. I have to admit- I wanted to cry all the way there. I thought I had reached my limit on people needing me and here is Bryce now needing so much help and is absolutely no help at all now! Heavenly Father was mindful of me and helped me work it all out. Bryce's foot has healed quite quickly and I had to learn to keep taking it one step at a time. So many people were great to keep checking on me and that helped my sanity alot!

This picture doesn't even come close to doing justice on Bryce's foot. I should have taken more pictures the following day when it was completely black on the bottom and even more swollen. He sprained his ankle as well so that added an extra bit of fun for him to deal with! Luckily for Bryce they just let him use a special boot instead of a full cast (as long as he was careful.) From the picture above-- you can see how careful he is! :) Even now that it has been 6 weeks-- his foot still gets all swollen at night and he is limping around but is done with the crutches!



This isn't the best picture but I had to document how excited I was at getting my cherry trees all pruned up! It was an all day project but I did it! This isn't my first time doing it but with all that I have felt overwhelmed about-- I had to make sure that was included in.


Four handsome fellows just about to head out to General Priesthood meeting for General Conference! Lisa's husband -Kellen, my brother- Joe, my hunk of burning love- Bryce and his brother- Dustin. Thanks for being good sports for a quick photo-- They didn't really want to participate. :)

A few other things to note from April-- I have kept up on planting my garden and I am so excited about it!

I started running each morning before the kids wake up. I go just over 2 miles but haven't been able to run the whole way until TODAY!!! I was SO excited today! I had a minor setback at the beginning when my back started spasming when I would run but that seems to be ok now.

Bryce still traveled quite a bit. He learned how to make it through giant airports on crutches and could leave everyone else in the dust. He would just show up to the boarding gate a sweaty mess! (I bet his seat buddy was happy about that.) He did have a close call though when he went to pass a guy who was walking really slowly down the terminal, accidently put one of his crutches down on the guys luggage strap which pulled the bag out of the guy's hand and made Bryce's crutch go flying through the air. Luckily he caught himself before he face planted in in the middle of the airport and the guy couldn't seem to get mad a cripple. :)

I got a new Relief Society calling! I am now the 1st counselor and am over the activities. JUST when I finally felt like I had a handle on things being the 2nd counselor! This made April CRAZY! Our secretary was taking some time off with her new baby so I was filling in as much as I could there, we lost our 1st counselor so she could be the YW president so I was trying to help there and then it became my job! After a few weeks they called a new 2nd counselor so I tried to help get her going on my old job while learning the in and outs of my new job! Whew! I am glad May hasn't been so crazy.

That will have to be for another post though.

Oh- one more thing! The perfect note to end on... Bryce and I have been going on more dates lately!!! We have been trying to go on a date each week. Generally nothing big but it is SO nice to get away for a few hours together! We have been to dinner, the temple, shopping, an art exhibit and I can't wait for more! It hasn't worked out as well in May so far but we are getting back on track this week!

Happy 60th Birthday Mom!

This month my mom turned the big 60! She didn't want a big deal made of it so we did a family dinner at my house. It was SO much fun!!! Everyone was there except for Dave and his family that live in Arizona. It was like old times just hanging out talking and laughing. The cousins seemed to have fun playing together and the night went by WAY too fast! Lisa made the cake and it was lit up with 60 candles! By the time she blew them all out there wasn't much left of the cool whip on top of the cake. :) A few things I love and appreciate about my mom: *She is so sweet! *Always has a smile on her face *Her home is always open for anyone to stop in *She gives the best hugs *She sacrificed SO much to be a stay at home mom. She drove us everywhere, took the BEST care of us when we were sick and she taught us how to clean! *Mom taught me how to pray by her example. Especially seeing her saying prayers in private.

*Mom is a good listener and she tries hard to not get all worked up and butt into our lives... when she does get worked up-- I know it is only cause she cares so much.

*She is beautiful!

*She loves to shop for clothes and taught us to wait for good deals. She also taught us how to make sure things fit right! Especially shoes.

Mom- I love you to death and am the luckiest girl ever to have you in my life! I hope you had a great birthday!!!

In my own Bermuda triangle?!

I feel like I have fallen off of the face of the earth for life as I know it. We spent almost the ENTIRE month of February home being sick. It was mostly the kids but I got to take my turn too. Bryce was also out of town most of February... literally... most of February, but fortunately when I was sick... he was kindof home. :) We jumped into a super busy March with Bryce still traveling a lot for work and a schedule packed in tight! He had lasik done on one eye and we are excited to see (literally) postitive results from that. He said the procedure wasn't bad at all but after watching it-- I will have to wear glasses if my vision ever starts to go. I can't handle eye drops in my eye-- let alone all that I saw them do to him! It grosses me out. Also in March we celebrated my mom's 60th birthday! (That will have to be another post though cause she is too great to be mashed in with this one!) One goal that I finally got accomplished this year was to build and put in a few grow boxes! I am trying the square foot gardening and am SO excited!!! I have planted some peas and onions so far. I am a bit worried that I haven't seen any sprouts yet but it has only been 2 weeks since I planted them so I can't get into a tizzy about it yet. With my black thumb... I do have cause to worry though! I have it all mapped out on what I want planted and when it needs to be done. I hope I can get it to work! I love gardening and being outside. There is just something about all of it that just gets me excited and I feel a huge sense of satisfaction making things look nice and watching stuff grow. I am trying not to lose my mind in the process of life. I seem to be on the losing side of the battle though lately. I left my camera outside (all night!) a few weekends ago and it poured rain on it! I was just sick when I realized it! I had taken it outside to snap a few pictures of the kids one Saturday and set it on the deck steps so it would be handy if I wanted a few more pics but also out of the way of anyone stepping on it. I also knew I would see it on my way back inside. Unfortunately I changed my plans without thinking. I helped the kids carry balls into the garage after we played "poison ball" on the trampoline and in the garage door I went to make lunch. Bryce was gone that weekend dirtbiking and life was crazy taking care of the kids and such. I didn't go out back again that day and we enjoyed a fun evening inside while it rained outside! After all of that my camera still works! I do think though that some stuff isn't the same. I am still upset about it. How could I let this happen to my camera?! I love that camera and DON'T want to buy a new one! I am going to keep taking pictures with it and see what they turn out like. :( On top of that great news of my camera... we also found out that AT&T is purchasing T-Mobile! What does this mean for Bryce's job??? Who knows. It will probably take a year or so for it all to really go through but it adds a sense of unease for me. I know he is working hard and it will all work out in the end... but I am comfortable with where I am now. Enough said. We will be fine. We have worked hard and have tried to make good financial choices to help support us in hard times so let's hope we did enough if we need it. I am glad that spring is coming and it is warming up outside. I have struggled a lot in March. My emotions have been all out of whack and some days I have to fight hard to want to get out of bed. I like to see accomplishment and feel like I am moving forward in my day. Mason is requiring SO much time and looking after that it doesn't leave much for anything else. He is like a tornado that leaves a path of destruction everywhere he goes. It is totally his age but some days I am not sure if I will survive. He totally wears me out and most days I need a nap to stay sane. It has been extra hard this time around. I think having Bryce traveling so much has added lots more to my plate of things to take care of and has worn me out fast! I think I fell into a pretty good depression in March. I wanted to shut down and I had a hard time dealing with people. I felt so bad cause I didn't even want to throw a party for Mason! Nothing against him but I couldn't face the work, the crowd of people and all the caious that comes with it. Fortunately I started to feel a bit better and it all worked out for his big day. I am trying to take things slow and steady and hopefully it will all keep on the up and up from here. The sun seems to help me a lot! I am trying REALLY hard to not turn to treats for my emotional support. I am mad that I have a gut and eating junk food to make me feel better isn't helping that... I wish it would though! I ran across a funny comic today that I tried to scan in and couldn't get it to work so I took a picture of it with my camera:

This is totally how I feel every day! Except I don't mind actually eating the chocolate! That is half of the fun. My body is retaining more of the fat that I appreciate so I am cutting back and getting my rear kicked with my ab workout video. Speaking of which... I need to go do that. Well- one more day of March and here comes April! I can do this. I can do this! :)

Happy 1st Birthday Mason!

Happy Birthday Mason! Holy cow...This past year has flown by! And what a good year it has been. We had fun celebrating Mason's 1st birthday. We partied it up the Saturday before his birthday with cake and icecream. As I was laying in bed that night we counted up 41 people attending the party! Wow! This kid is loved! :) Mason had a great time opening his presents and LOVED pulled everything out of the bags as fast as he could and handing it all to me. As we say in our house, "He is as fast as Lightning McQueen!" With all of the cousins there to have fun Mason stoood back while they played with all of his new toys. He seemed totally ok with that! This kid is generally pretty laid back. We took a million pictures all day but I am getting worn down in my old age and had to just pick a few to post.

A few fun things about Mason:

*His favorite hobby is to empty out the kitchen cupboards, drawers, my bathroom cupboards, play in the toilet, empty the bookselves, turn on and off the XBox360 and stick his fingers in the VCR and DVD slots! He can do ALL of these in less than 5 minutes flat if I am distracted!

*Our house is a constant obstacle course with items that Mason picks up and leaves all over.

*He has mastered going up and down the stairs on his knees

*He says "HERE!" and you better listen and respond in 2 seconds or the item he is handing to you will be on the floor.

*He knows how to sign "more" and he especially does it if he sees treats (cookies) or if he is hungry. It cracks me up cause he signs "more" even if he hasn't had anything yet.

*Mason doesn't really say much. He will say mom and here, but other than that he wanders around in silence.

*Maybe silence isn't the best description-- he likes to make different sounds with his mouth and jabbers. He has a loud commanding jabber if he wants your attention (and a high pitched scream if you take something away or make him come out of the bathroom)

*Mason is hard to photograph. He doesn't smile on command and usually looks like he is thinking about stuff, analyzing what is happening or actually moving to go check something out.

*Mason doesn't like to really sit on your lap and read for more than a minute but really LOVES to look at books on his own. Lots of books at once!

*Mason has gorgeous, HUGE blue eyes, blonde hair and 5 teeth. 2 bottom middle ones, 2 top fang teeth and he finally got it one of his top middle teeth on the day of his party! (March 26th)

*Mason LOVES my phone and carries it all around. He will put it up to his head, jabber a bit and set it back down. He kisses it alot and I am not sure if it is cause there are pictures of the family on the front screen or what!

*Mason has stopped waving good-bye but will give hugs and kisses to us and sometimes to others if he is in the right mood.

*He is trying to decide if he wants to switch down to 1 nap a day. Most days he won't go to sleep in the morning anymore-- unless I am out doing errands. This has been a challenge for me! Even if he takes one nap, he barely sleeps for over an hour. He definitely needs more than that! I need more than that! :)

Mason is a sweet kid and just melts my heart constantly. He is very well taken care of by Abbey, Braxton and Landen. They get him laughing so hard and are always on patrol for him getting into stuff. I can't imagine our little family without him. Happy 1st Birthday Mason! We love you SOOOO much!!!

He gets it from me... Uh oh!

Could it really be??? I don't want to admit it but I just realized this weekend that Braxton gets his bad sportsmanship from ME! We were playing connect as a family yesterday and I went head to head with Bryce and lost. That boiled my blood faster than the speed of light. I wanted to stomp my feet, cuss out some nasty words and hurl a large object at the tv! WHAT?! Over a game? I couldn't believe I felt that way! At that moment a light bulb came on in my head and I saw things through Braxton's eyes for a minute. I felt so sorry for him.

I knew better than to act out on my previously mentioned thoughts and calmly walked away, eyes on fire, teeth gritted together and trying to take deep breaths.

I have never liked to play sports or really any type of games and I think that is the case because I am WAY TO COMPETITIVE! I DON'T like to lose! I can't handle losing! I obviously didn't learn how to be a good loser. Maybe it is the perfectionist in me... who knows.

So now Braxton and I can enroll in anger management classes together and both be taught now to lose gracefully. He is doing better at controlling his temper (for the most part). Or maybe he is just holding it in more like I did yesterday.

Most likely I will continue to steer clear of competition so everyone keeps their head! :) I am sorry Braxton that you didn't get more of your dad's laid back personality.

Jordan World Circus!

There is a first time for everything! And this was a first time that the kids or I have ever been to a circus! Abbey came home from school Tuesday afternoon for free kid tickets with a paying adult. I did the math and it turned out to not be that bad of a deal. I checked my budget envelopes and was able to scrounge up just enough money to go. I warned the kids before we left that I was paying to get in to the cirucs and that was it... nothing more. We loaded up the kids pockets with their treats and headed for a good time. I was glad that I had warned them in advance about not buying stuff once we got there cause they get you coming and going with all sorts of different things. I did feel bad cause I thought it would have been fun to ride on the elephant. When at any other time in my life am I going to get a chance to ride an elephant? I had to remind myself of other goals and things I want to do in the next little while and that helped ease the pain of not spening 60 bucks on a family elephant ride.


We got 4th row seats just off to the right of the center stage a bit. We felt a part of the action. A few of our favorites were the elephant tricks (especially when the one large elephant did a hand stand!), juggling acts with swords and fire sticks, a balancing act with lots of chairs, a funny clown, 4 motorbikers riding at the same time in the metal "ball of death" cage and a magic act of changing outfits on a lady. The whole family had a blast!!! I was so worried that the kids would feel deprived for me not spending extra money on the extra stuff but the moment we were out of the arena they had forgotten all about it and just kept talking about the fun that they DID have. It was a great night and I am glad that we went.


We didn't take too many pictures cause we were busy juggling Mason and just enjoying the show. Thanks to Bryce for taking the pictures of the actual performances!

Here are a couple of quick photos before the circus started. We were there early to get good seats before it all filled up.

Pictures don't do the balancing guy justice. He was really cool. So were the elephants. We were too slow getting the camera back out for some of their trickier stunts.

Update on Obsession...

I have had a day of success, a few days of indulgence and a lot of realizations! First off, I have to say that I believe my body was going through withdrawls from sugar last week! I am still thinking about sugar a lot but I am not going as crazy as I was last week. I almost wanted to crawl out of my skin last week but survived! I ended the week with a GREAT success! Saturday night Bryce and I went to the adult meeting for Stake Conference. We had planned to go to dinner sometime that night but had both eaten a HUGE lunch of our homemade Cafe Rio sweet pork salad (me)/ burritos (Bryce) so we weren't really hungry for much dinner. Having in my head that we could just skip straight to treats I suggested we grab one after the meeting. As we were driving around nothing was sounding fantastic to me. I then suggested we go to Macey's grocery store cause there is bound to be SOMETHING in there bakery, frozen section or treat isle that would be delicious! I grabbed a basket when we walked in and Bryce instantly worried that I would fill it up before we left. We walked all over the store and left EMPTY HANDED!! Can you believe that???!!! I saw things that were tasty but nothing was "worth falling off the bandwagon" for. That was a proud moment for me!

I must have gotten a little bit cocky cause then on Sunday I made cinnamon rolls for dessert. There were several extra which became my Monday morning breakfast and then another one that day as a snack and just one more after the kids went to bed that night. (I didn't want them to dry out and get all stale!) Horrible reasoning I know. It didn't help that I could smell them every time I walked into the kitchen and they just stared me down while I choked down Cheerios. They are so much better than Cheerios!!!

We then took the kids to the circus last night and of course you need to have treats when you do something special like that! I dug a few more treats out of the food storage and we went off for a good time. I did use some self control to not eat the entire bag of stuff that we brought (which I would have done in the past without too much hesitation).

I have realized that I can make a "special occasion" out of anything! I have been rewarding myself with treats for making through the day, to help me relax, to help me from being antsy, give me energy, etc... I know that life isn't going to stop happening and I have to deal with it in other ways than food. The spare tire hanging out around my waistline is a good reminder to stay on track! I can do this! :)